By Salt 106.5 Network Sunday 4 Aug 2024Finance and BusinessReading Time: 3 minutes

“What sets leaders apart is emotional intelligence.”

Key Points:

• Leaders used to be expected to operate as either stoic or devoid of emotion, or “constantly cheerful, positive or upbeat”.
• Emotional intelligence involves self-awareness, empathy, self-regulation of emotions, social skills and motivation.

Yannick Lawry is a counsellor and therapeutic coach with Big Light.

Yannick told Hope Mornings that leaders used to be expected to operate at either end of an emotional spectrum.

If a leader was not stoic or devoid of emotion, they needed to be “constantly cheerful, positive or upbeat”.

Leaders used to be expected to operate as either stoic or devoid of emotion, or “constantly cheerful, positive or upbeat”.

However, that does not match with how we all are emotionally complicated.

A better approach to leadership is to embrace emotional intelligence, according to Yannick.

Simply defined, emotional intelligence is better understanding ourselves and others as we interact and relate.

Emotional intelligence involves self-awareness, empathy, self-regulation of emotions, social skills and motivation.

Emotional intelligence involves self-awareness, empathy, self-regulation of emotions, social skills and motivation.

But what if we are not very good at emotional intelligence?

Is it possible to get “smarter”?

“Absolutely, there are ways to improve your emotional intelligence,” Yannick said.

For the leaders – and the rest of us – here are Yannick’s 10 tips for improving our emotional intelligence:

1. Get out of your comfort zone

Doing something that makes you feel uncomfortable stretches your emotional intelligence. Be prepared for awkward or challenging growth.

2. Be aware of personal triggers

Accept that “negative” emotions will arise. Rather than feel guilty or try to ignore them, watch out for what can incite them.

3. Don’t judge yourself

We can berate ourselves for not being ‘better’ at handling or expressing our emotions. As we strive to learn and develop emotional intelligence, be kind to yourself.

4. Make decisions in a good mood

How we feel can impact what we choose to do. Be mindful of your mood and the bearing it has upon what you do (or wished you did not do).

5. Don’t make decisions in a bad mood

During a meeting, on site or in an email, you might have done something you regretted later. In the moment, anger or negativity clouded your judgment.

6. Get a bird’s eye view

Perspective can influence your emotional intelligence. Stand back from the situation and look at it from different angles.

7. See yourself in others

In real-life or when you see somebody on social media or in a TV show, observe how they deal with emotions which you encounter. Be it anxiety or joy, anger or uncertainty, you can get a “range of data” on how others respond to what you also confront. Keep note of behaviour or thinking that you can adopt.

8. List your values

What is most important to you? Write out an actual list of your key values (like integrity or kindness, for example). Seek to align your emotions with upholding these values.

9. Get feedback…

Be open to receiving input about your emotional intelligence and how it can be enhanced or improved.

10. …From trusted sources

Make sure the feedback you receive is from people you trust. You are more likely to listen to and act upon their advice about your blind spots.

Article supplied with thanks to Ben McEachen. Ben is Hope 103.2’s Mornings host. Ben was a full-time movie reviewer for more than a decade, including for Open House, The Big Picture, The Advertiser and Empire. Before Hope, he was deputy editor of Eternity News.

All images supplied and used with permission. Header image by CanvaPro